Anne Marie's Australian Adventure

Follow the Adventures of Anne Marie, Fergus, Cooper and Bean Sidhe in Australia!!

Quick Trip to California

Posted by Anne Marie Serrano on December 13, 2009

A family crisis prompted me to go to California at short notice. Fergus’ parents were in need of some help.

The trip to California was difficult but productive. It was an emotionally trying week but we were able to arrange some home care for my in-laws without to much resistance from them. My mother-in-law has early stages of Alzheimer’s and while she is able to take care of her personal hygiene, cooking and some housekeeping with the assistance of my father-in-law, she can not be left alone because she gets scared and confused. My father-in-law is mentally fine for 83 but I can tell he is mentally and physically exhausted because he has to think and remember everything for both of them and his physical health isn’t great.

They finally would accept that having someone come in at least once a week (it’s a start) to help with some housekeeping and transportation (Martin’s diving license has been suspended) would be okay. I was able to meet with the actual woman who will be coming to the house and I am very comfortable with her. I think she will be a good match for them. I must tell you it broke my heart to see how difficult it has become for them and so touched by how protective and supportive they are towards each other. I don’t know what we will do when one of them dies. They don’t know how they will cope with out the other.

They are beginning to talk about the difficulties the future will bring and know that at sometime they will have to decide about selling the house and moving somewhere without stairs, near shopping, and with some assistance care. I think it was a relief for them to know that Fergus and I will help them with whatever they decide, the thoughts of physically trying to move is overwhelming. I told them I would come and help, get them help to make the move and oversee what needs to be done so that they don’t have to worry about anything but taking care of each other during the process. First things first is just getting someone they can rely on now while they are in the house.

I didn’t want them to be home alone for Christmas and Fergus doesn’t have any time off for us to visit them so we’ve arranged for them to come and spend Christmas with us. It will give them something to look forward to and a bit of a break from all the emotional upheaval they have been going though in the past couple of months.
I may have to go back in January or February depending on the outcome of Martin’s driving test (he is scheduled to test in January to get his license back). If he is denied then we will really have to get them moved somewhere more accessible to transportation and shopping.

I did have a chance to have a short visit with my brother and his family. They are all doing great. I hope next visit I can spend more time with them but they understood my need to help Martin and Margaret on this visit.

I am emotionally depleted. Fergus’  mom just hung on to me and cried when I had to leave. She is so scared and I don’t blame her, I’m scared for them. It just breaks my heart to see them like this.
It is good to be back in the comfort of my home with Fergus and the kids, BS is my little shadow, Freddie was beside himself with joy when he jumped into my lap, Coop said, “Oh, did you go somewhere?”  It’s nice to know some things never change.


One Response to “Quick Trip to California”

  1. Chris S. said

    It was great to see you! Please let me know if there is anything I can do in Moraga.

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